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(+2)(-2)

I really enjoyed this game and can't wait for the full release. 

I have one suggestion tho. In chapter 8, when meeting Emos again, it feels a bit off that a MC with a high might stat just stands there and waits for the pain instead of trying to doge or block the hit, so maybe change the text form "You brace yourself for the pain..." to something like "you move to block the hit / try to doge as person X steps between you to" if the MC has a high might stat.

(+6)(-1)

Thanks for playing and I'm glad you're enjoying it! The game is in a very rough draft state so you're not going to see different flavour text based on skills but expect to see it in the final version 😊

(-3)

Sad that i couldnt do the cgaracter i was looking foward to, but still a REALLY good game, sad that i dont talk too much in conversations

Can I ask what character you were hoping to play? Thanks for giving the game a try!

Its kust a silly thing, i wanted a more "Hollow" character that would train way sooner to avenge his mother, but dont worry about me

Ah, I'm sorry 🌼 I tried my best to add as many personality choices as I could but I always struggled with the stoic/hollow options. That said, if you've reached Chapter 5, there's really no point for vengeance 😅

Just finished it and omg I cannot wait for more! it had me crying at times. which you deserve applause for bc I'm not usually an emotional person lol. I also love Irus so much I don't think I can try anyone else now lol

(+1)

Thank you for playing! I'm pleased that the game and plot made you feel what the MC was feeling and I'm really glad you're enjoying Irus' route 😊 

(+1)

Amazing! Im ganna b a patreon, im hooked!

(+1)

Thank you! I'm so happy you're enjoying it and thank you for considering to subscribe to my Patreon 😊

(-1)

I just finished the demo and romanced Irus and I loved his romance/NSFW scene they are so well written tho since Irus has to become king he will eventually need heirs I'm guessing and since I'm playing a male MC I wonder how it will work out 🤔

(+4)

I'm so happy you're enjoying his romance! There is no need for natural heirs - adoption is very much a thing in the game world. There's also the fact that in Cyre, rulers can choose to appoint their successor who doesn't have to be their child. That said, Irus does not want to become a father - there's a lot more explanation on my Tumblr so you can browse through that if you're interested 😊

Oh thanks I will definitely check out your Tumblr !

This is by far the most detailed and beautifully made interactive story I have ever read. Do you by chance have any suggestions of any books that you think have some of the elements shown in this story or from which you were inspired to write this?

(+1)

Thank you for your kind words! I actually wasn't inspired by novels to write this game but rather my interest in ancient civilisations like Sumeria, Egypt and Greece. From there, I adapted the game's idea with some elements from various other ancient nations and that's how the game came about 😅 My real life has taken away my time for reading so I've not read anything remotely related to the game since I first started developing it.  You can read up on the three main ancient civilisations but I'm not sure how interesting it might be for you 😆

(+4)

I LOVE Irus!! There's so much romantic content, I'm unused to such romantic depth (like talking to Redall first on the boat causing Irus to be jelly, just lots of fun flavor text + nice moments) and it's not even finished yet! ^^

(+1)

Thank you! I'm happy you're enjoying Irus' romantic route and his romance scenes 😊 I wanted to write a fantasy/political romance game, although I much prefer just writing romance all the time 😅

(+2)

OMG I love it. The setting is great and it reminds me of arcadie second born. Can't wait for the full game.

(+1)

Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying the game so much 😊

adding the ending scene with irus at the end of chap 8 to the millionth time a nsfw scene has made me cry, i love my mc and him so bad it makes me sick !! so excited to get the full version someday <3

(+1)

I'm glad you enjoyed the scene with Irus! Thank you for playing and for your support 💖

(+6)

HEARTBROKEN that this is the end for the demo updates, but you can bet your ass I'm going to buy the game once it's released on steam. You don't understand how much I love Irus this game. (Hint: It's a LOT.)

Thank you for all the amazing content and fun interactions here and on your blog! It's been a pleasure to enjoy the demo so far and I can only imagine the full game will be amazing as well. Much love~ <3

(+3)

Thank you so much! 💖 I'll still be posting fun tidbits on the blog and definitely continue answering asks. I'm so happy you found Irus' romance route to be enjoyable and hopefully, the full game won't disappoint with his romance.  Thank you for your support and make sure to send an ask if you're ever curious about the game or even the progress!

(3 edits)

hi Ramona

just completed the game a few hours ago again and i stil really like it. chapter 8 was great, especially Eloras intimate scene. for me it was perfect.


before i ask my questions i would like to compliment you for your writing/writing style. i already knew the story (up to chapter 8) but i was still sad when ahlf died and was still surprised at the plottwist in ishari, to name some examples. also its impressive how easy it is to imagine the scenes you describe in our own head.


now to my questions:

1.A.) this time it was the first time i unlocked my divinity. it added a new stat-bar to the other 3 (might/leadership/politics). since divinity seems to be tied more in the story, does this mean the number/percentage you have in this stat will affecting the story more than the other 3 stats?

B.) so far there was only one opportunity to train your divinity (on the ship towards the southern isles; it got me from 50 => 55). in this case the option was quite obviously, it literally said "train your divinity". will it be always an obviously choice to improve the divinity-stat or will they become more and more  "secreter" (e.g. options says somethng like "train with Anu" vs "train with Sir Oren" =>  depending on whom you choose you either imrpove the Divinity-stat or warfare/might-stat)-


2.) in the prologue/chapter 1 you can get a statue of an ancient one from a merchant. i chose the one who represent death/fighting (im sorry for not remembering the name). so far i didnt noticed anything in regards of this choice. will it matter in future chapters? or did i miss something?


3.A.) this is my only critique/request in chapter 8 i have. before embarking the ship and sailing tothe Southern Isles you have a choice to go and say goodby to one of the given choices. while i understand that MC is under time pressure i really wished that we had an opportunity to say a quick goodbye to Rana (and optional to her father too). => personal idea: give her the statue you got from the merchant and say something like "keep it safe until im back".  maybe i just want to have more interactions with her since there are almost none in chapter 7.

B.) spoiler ahead so dont read if you didnt played the game so far...

when you decide to meet your mothers new family, you can choose to become close to Rana but not to her father (again, sorry for not remembering his name). i chose this option in my game, but always wondered what exactly this means. does this mean i/MC will ignore her father? or will i be able to have a friendly relationship with him, while having a sisterly relation with Rana & a motherly with my mother?


4.) can you maybe give an estimate timeframe how long the game will take until its final release? please dont get me wrong, i rather wait longer and having fleshed out story than a rushed one.



EDIT: just read some older comments and i stumpled across one, where you mentioned a free bonus game, which functions as a sequel. do you have any informations about that one, which you can share?



once again thank you very much for such a wonderful game & story. 

(+2)

Thank you so much for your kind words! I always wonder if I'm describing the scenes enough because sometimes it feels like it's not enough to help readers understand what I'm trying to convey, so it's nice to know that I am 😊

  1.  A. No stat is more important than another. The divinity stat comes into play if you choose to worship the deities (Solus or the Ancient Ones). But you're not going to be punished if you don't worship the deities. The divinity stat will open up more options for the MC to complete tasks, but it won't cause you to fail at the end goal of the game if you don't pursue it.

    B. It will be a mix of both, it's not so much a secret that if you choose to train with Anu and you've unlocked your divinity, you'll be able to get some help from her (considering she also has divine blessings) to train it too. But there'll also be choices like the one in Chapter 8 that will be more direct. At this point, it's a very rough draft version of the demo, so I'll come back during edits to include more options to increase stats.
  2. It's there for flavour text, nothing more than that. Sorry 😅 This might change during edits depending on feedback I receive from testers but for now, it's just something you carry.
  3. A. The idea is that you don't have time to speak with many people - including Rana. Chapter 8 is all about the Southern Islands so you won't see much of Ishari in it or the people from there. Chapter 9 is the family chapter (it's what I refer to it as) because that's when you will get tons of family time (and drama). I didn't add the option to say goodbye to more than one person because of time constraints, but it'll be added during edits. Rana doesn't care for an idol but you can offer to bring her a gift from the Southern Islands. I'll be adding more interactions with her once edits start so rest assured you will get more time with her (eventually).

    B. It means that you choose to have a relationship with Rana but not Danzor or Salyra. You won't be forced to play happy family with Salyra or Danzor - but you can play the older sibling role for Rana.
  4. About two years or a little more than that😅 There's four more chapters and an epilogue to write - that combined with my IRL job, it's going to take me a while.

It's not really a sequel of the game, more of a DLC detailing the time after the war and dealing with what comes after the alliances etc. I'll probably release the prologue either today/tomorrow for the public because I won't have time to work on it for a while.

Thank you for your support and I hope that answered your questions!

thank you very much for answering my questions. 

since you mentioned it, here a quick question: can you still bring a gift for Rana, even if you didnt spoke to her before departing?

(+1)

No, that will only be triggered if you speak to her 😊

I loved this storyline and game so much 💌

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the plot and game 😊 Thanks for the kind comment and for playing!

(+1)

id pay $20 dollars to play it on here ^^

It won't cost nearly that much when it's completed 😆

okay ^w^

I am really enjoying the update so far. However, I just got to the Southern Islands and it's not registering Dena's gender for me. I am getting $DGender whenever the character is brought up. Not sure if I am the only one experiencing this (I was going to report this on the 'bug' form, but I am unable to choose chapter 8 on it at this time lol).

(1 edit) (+1)

Did you restart the game? The variable was added to the prologue which is where it's set so if you haven't replayed the prologue where you meet Dena and choose their gender, the $DGender variable will show up - that said, has it come up in any other instance? If not, it might just be that one variable is incorrect on my part 😅

Ah I'm sure that is the issue then. I just loaded my save and went from there. I'll restart and see if it comes up again, but I doubt it will. Thanks! 😅

No problem! 😊

(+2)

Update was amazing!  Can't wait for the full release!

(+1)

Thank you! I'm really happy you enjoyed it 🌼

(+2)

Curious if there's plans to make a Chapter 8 apk for android (Love the game btw!)

(+1)

For now, I've removed the apk due to the fact that I hadn't had time to update it with Chapter 8. I'll probably create one eventually, but for now, it's only available for desktop/pc though you can still play the game on your phone on itch.io 😊

(1 edit) (+6)

good God my love for Irus is bordering unhealthy frfr

TMI time - so i'm in an unhappy relationship and something happened and i have been crying since morning even after doing things for distraction now tell me why my brain just suggested "guess it's time to see Irus then" and tell me why i did exactly that and tell me why it actually worked?? Irus said 'beloved' and suddenly my tears backtracked into my eyes?? the sky cleared up?? my missing cat came back home?? (okay he didn't he's still missing but ya get my point sad lol)

my point is I JUST NEED IRUS IN MY LIFE IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR </3

(+7)

I'm happy that Irus could make you feel better and I'm sorry you're going through such a hard time IRL. Sometimes, it's easier to just relax with fictional men to cheer you up 😅 I'm really sorry about your missing cat, I know what it's like to lose your pet. Cats are notorious for disappearing for days and even weeks on end, and I hope that your cat gets back to you! Thank you for playing and I'm sending my virtual love that everything works out for you 🌸

(+2)

aah thank you! and i'm sorry about your pet :( my cat's been missing for couple months now but i'm not losing hope! <3

fictional men are truly a blessing fr and Irus omg IRUS like when i need to escape from reality i usually turn to my fav VN or IF and stalking your tumblr or replaying sweet moments with Irus are included in my usual escape routes lol 

 i've commented few months ago to declare my love to Irus and it stands true till this day ayy if life isn't so harsh and money isn't so tight i'd truly love to support you on Patreon :" for now i can only pray that you'd be blessed with health and good night sleep and your fav food whenever you're craving it! <3

you have no idea how amazed i am of your mind like gaahh you've created my ideal man like that's my ideal man right there!!! *manifesting hard for IRL Irus to come and get me outta herreee*

(+3)

Thank you so much for your support! I know I say this a lot, but honestly, it's players like you that make writing an interactive fiction game worthwhile. I enjoy writing but sometimes, it gets really hard to want to write variations of scenes and then I see all the sweet comments and support from everyone and it makes it easy to push through and continue writing. Please don't feel pressured to support me on Patreon - I am grateful to those who can, but it's not what I live for. I live for comments like yours that make me realise that I'm not some crazy person who's writing something no one wants to play. Irus is really based on all my trashy-teen romances that I used to write when YA novels were still what my life revolved around - he's a little more mature than the teen-fiction love interests I used to write, but he's made up of all the good bits that made me swoon so I'm glad you're enjoying him ❤️️

(+2)

ahh at the end of the day we all just lil creatures who thrive on trashy teen romance lmao <3 also, i write for myself, like, just making up fantasy worlds for me to read before sleep, i suck af but that's how i know that writing is HARD! i truly respect you and every IF author who creates magical stories in their head then share it with the world <3 ALSO nooo you're not crazyyy stay stronggg <3 and if it's any help, it's IF like yours that helps me taking steps away from the brink of madness. i mean it, truly, no exaggeration. i was at a low point in my life when i found the world of interactive novel and it quickly became my escapism. life still hasn't gotten any better but i cope by manifesting all the good things i've read in IFs and IRUS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE OF COURSE IM MANIFESTING IRUS ILL KEEP GOING IF IT MEANS ILL EVENTUALLY MEET MY OWN IRUS  <333

(+4)

this is my first time commenting on anything but i just had to. i'm so very much in love with the story and especially, Elora! i must say i adore your writing and your attention to detail while doing it, something about the companionship in this game -and again, especially the relationship with Elora brings me so much comfort. this may be one of my favourite IF game ever and i can't wait for the next chapters! thank you so much for sharing your amazing work, i couldn't have asked for a better game to spend my entire night (yes, i have finished the game within 5+ hours and now it's almost 4 am hhahhaha!)

(+2)

Thank you so much for playing and I'm honoured you felt so strongly to leave a comment ❤️️ If you're enjoying Elora, Chapter 8 will be a lot of fun for you because there's a lot of her - especially if you're romancing her. Companionship was something I knew I wanted to be a big part of the relationship dynamics so it's been really fun to write and I'm happy that you're enjoying it. The next update is already out for my Patrons, but it will be released here for the public on the 1st of January. I hope you do get enough sleep after playing the entire thing! Thank you again for your support 😊

no worries at all, i wanted to share my feelings to let you know how incredibly fond of i am with your work ❤️️ i AM romancing Elora and i can't wait to see the next chapter! i think you are doing a wonderful job with the relationship dynamics, i love that it's not shallow at all and there are depths to each character and the way they react to situations. and i love that it will be released a day before my birthday🥺 i checked out your Tumblr page after playing it (cuz i needed to consume everything about this game hahahah) and saw that this game will be on Steam? can't wait for that!!! i also wanted to message u on tumblr because there are so many other things i want to tell u but i thought it'd be too much 😭😭thank you so much for being so kind to reply to me!!! and nope, i didn't get enough sleep because this game is all i can think about hahahaha!!!! ❤️️ ❤️️❤️️❤️️

Aww, thank you! Seriously, message away. I'm on leave for the holiday period from work, so I'm a lot more active now on Tumblr than I have been for the past few weeks and since the chapter is complete, I have some time to respond to messages 😊 You can ask me whatever you want on Tumblr, I really don't mind.

(+1)

When is the next update? just asking and I love this game very enjoyable

(+1)

Chapter 8's release dates can be found here 😊 Essentially, it'll be the 1st of January 2024.

I'm so excited for this thank you for giving us this :)

You're welcome and thank you for your support 😊

(+2)

Elora, I will see you soon! 🥹

(+1)

Yes, you will 😊

I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but seriously tho, great game, cant wait for the next update! :D

Thank you! I'm so pleased you're enjoying the game 🌼

Hey is there any walkthrough to get through an optimal path by any chance?

(+1)

There is no optimal path 😊 So there is no walkthrough. The game doesn't rely heavily on stats, but more so on certain choices. It will be very hard to get a bad ending so don't stress about your choices. If there's something in particular that you want to achieve, just let me know and I'll be happy to help!

(+4)(-1)

got soooo excited when the cover changes thinking it was a chap update 😭😭😭 Don't rush, take your time IK chapter eight is goin be gooood

(+8)(-1)

The cover change is because I've finally gotten the official cover for Steam so I was excited to use it 😊 Expect the update in approximately two and a half weeks. The current Chapter 8 is around 89K words and there's still a few scenes to complete before it's ready but hopefully it's not too long of a wait! Thank you for being so supportive 💖 

(1 edit) (+2)

OMG MERRY CRHISTMASSS ♥♥♥♥

sups excited <3

(+3)

Yes! I look forward to more of prince Irus. <3

(+3)

YOU’RE UPDATING IT? OH MY GOD THIS IS SOMETHING I CARE ABOUT 

(+1)

Wait wait, STEAM? as in, this game is coming to STEAM? hell yeah

(+2)

Yes, eventually it will be released there 😊 I've already got the page waiting for me to upload stuff so once the game is completed, that will be my main focus so I can get the game ready for wishlists 🎉

(+2)

just wanted to come on here and comment that ive played though this two times now and i still love it! The story is amazing and I adore all the characters (especially Irus) I can’t wait to see more of the game

(+4)(-1)

Thank you do much! I'm hopeful for a Christmas release for Chapter 8 - depending on how long I take to write the last few scenes 😅 Thanks for playing!

(+5)

not Irus and MC living double lives. Both dad's died, both mom's ran off and became priestesses like hey twinnn 😝

(+2)

Their lives are very similar 😋 It is on purpose and plays on the theme of fate and their journey together.

Ramona G. will you be doing a windows version soon or will it just be for mobile because I don't have an android and I really want to download this game because it's so goood!

Currently, you can play the game on your PC online - I've not put a downloadable version of the game itself other than the apk because it's not yet complete and there's still a lot that needs to be edited. Chapter 8 is the last chapter of the public demo so once that's done (hopefully before the end of the year), I'll be able to post the downloadable versions - even for PC 😊

(+3)

Wow!! What a great read and it is still in its  early draft/demo phase??!! Damn! Can't wait to see how the story grows. 

Kudos to the creator(or to the team if it is), keep it up, this is a gem!!! 

Queen Elora is absolutely my favorite and am smiling wide like an idiot in the flirting scenes. 

SPOLIER!! 

The fact that she wants to court the MC and the first time she asks MC to call her elora!! Muahhh! Chefs kiss. Heres hoping for more spicier scenes with elora in chapter 8 ;)

Question : how does this compare to Anu's romance line, i would think since she was introduced later in the story she and MC would have a long way to go.. Or is it quick paced? Just wanted to know, i am gonna try her route as well nonetheless. 

(+4)(-1)

Thank you so much for playing 🌼 I really appreciate your support and I'm super glad you're enjoying the game, even in its early stages!

I'm just a lonesome game dev, so no team involved here 😆 Thank you!

I'm so happy you're enjoying Elora's scenes! I always doubt the ROs scenes that aren't for Irus since I rarely get feedback about them. I'm happy you love her romance route 😊

There will be a guaranteed spicy scene in Chapter 8 and you'll also get a bit more background with her family in the Southern Islands. So look out for the end of next month 😄

Anu's route will really pick up speed in Part 3 of the game, she's much like Irus in that she will go after someone if she likes them regardless of how long they've spent with each other 😊 She's more kiss first, then come the talks of a relationship afterwards. I personally love her route since it's definitely filled with more innuendos 😆

THANK YOU!! for creating this wonderful read, and Hats off to you for the fact that you are doing this single handedly!

Can't wait to learn more about Elora and her story.


I am definitely playing again to try Anu's route and if you do not mind is there any specific date for the next update ? so that i can make a note of it. Thanks again for taking your time to reply.

(+1)

I can't give a definite date. If you can, follow me on Tumblr because it's where I post about my progress and more accurate dates for the updates 😊 I hope for an end-of-November/early December release - Chapter 8 is partially available on my Patreon to play as well if you can't wait that long.

Thanks for your comment!

(+1)

Nice to see another Elora fan. Seriously can't wait for Chapter 8.

(+1)

I'm so close to being done with Chapter 8 💖 Expect the first NSFW with Elora in the update!

Welcome fellow Elora fan 😁

(+10)(-2)

Spoilers ahead. 

Ah, I want to love the game, I truly do, but I cannot help but be a little disappointed with it. Starting with MC herself, who has no notable skills, yet somehow ends up protecting and advising the prince. But maybe she will get some sort of power later on, who knows, the game is not yet done, but still, it is an odd choice. Especially since her father was a high-ranked military man and could have easily trained her on either warfare, strategy or a bit about history/politics (depending on the choice made by the player, or just as a part of the story). That however I could ignore, since I do enjoy the writing style and sometimes you just read and write and play for fun. And the game is a lot of fun. Or rather, it could be. The biggest issue I have with The Crown of Exile is that it is supposed to be an "interactive fiction" and yet it feels like the choices influence nothing, save for the romance scene. No matter which option I choose for Alfh, the MC and her father note that they never shared a daughter-father bond and that it was impossible since she was her mother's daughter (yet she spent most of her childhood with him, Syl and Ishari had minimal influence over MC). No matter how blunt and crude MC is towards Irius, they seem to be best of friends a few scenes later (there is one choice where Mc can say that she won't forgive him for calling her "just a fisherman's daughter" and it is never mentioned again nor does it really change the relationship). Idk, as it is now, the game is more of a story than an IF game. And while it is not necessarily bad, both the overview of the story and the tags gave me completely different expectations. 

(+7)

I'm sorry you feel that way about the plot and game! Unfortunately, this is not a stat heavy IF, but s more narrative IF so you're making choices but following the same script. I dislike stat heavy IF games and prefer allowing players to choose whatever choices they want without being locked from choosing something simply because of earlier choices. 

As for Ahlf not training the MC, this was answered on my Tumblr. Ahlf hated his military background and didn't want to return to that by teaching the MC how to fight - he also had a hard time with the MC in general being their child. It's a complicated family relationship that creates a lot of turmoil for him as a character.

Have you reached Part of the game? There's something called divine blessings and you can unlock that skill later on.

That said, if this isn't to your liking, that's completely fine. I know that the game won't be for some and you giving it a try is enough 😊

(+4)

I get it, I kinda dislike IF games that heavily rely on stats too, but at the same time, those games usually have a high replay value, since the routs differ from one another significantly. But I know those can be taxing on the reader and it really boils down to personal preferences. 

See, I don't really follow your Tumblr and as far as I know, there was no mention of it in the story. Again, I know this is not the finished product, so it is possible you plan to include that, 

One last thing, I just wanted to appreciate how you've chosen to reply. It's heartening to see authors who won't tear a reader apart after some criticism. And while I might not be the biggest fan of the game, I do hope the game becomes a success. It's clear that you've put a lot of effort and love into writing this story. 

(+3)

It's no trouble at all! For now, this is a very, very rough draft. I've not gone back to include extra scenes and flavour texts for most things because it slows me down when I'm writing. My plan is to have the full game complete and then I'll be doing a long and arduous beta testing where I'll ask for more nuanced feedback where I can incorporate extra options and variations 😊

The Tumblr should be linked on the game page, here on itch.io. I haven't included my Tumblr in the game or promoted it that much so I don't blame you if you've not seen it.

I'm not new to the world of writing (fictional and academic), so I've gotten used to handling criticism from readers. You made some really good points, which I hope the final editing phase can address better. Thank you again for giving the game a try and leaving your feedback!

(-2)

SORRY BUT ACTUALLY 🤓☝

Spoilers aheeead!

I took this comment WAY too personally because these accusations are just... wrong. 

First off, you continue to use she/ her pronouns for MC. You get to choose the gender for MC so it's better to use they/them, but that's neither here nor there.

"Starting with MC herself, who has no notable skills, yet somehow ends up protecting and advising the prince."

This is just plain incorrect. One of the first stat impacting choices you get to make is if you wat to increase you leadership, politics, or warfare knowledge. MC is a person who develops skills. Like, you know, a human. Also, it is foreshadowed throughout the story that MC has some sort of connection with the Ancient one's, because of their eyes, and their mom. NOT TO MENTION in chapter even we LITERALLY WIELD Astes heart! :/

"...her father was a high-ranked military man and could have easily trained her on either warfare, strategy or a bit about history/politics..."

Now, did you just skin through the letters, or what? It is made PERFECTLY CLEAR when you question Ahlf about his past and read the letters he kept in the Jade box that he was kicked off of the blood guard for his romantic escapades with Salyra. He left the past of being a blood guard behind him when it impacted him and his loved one. He kept MC distant as not to hurt them. WHY would he teach them to be a human blood hound when that was not what he himself wanted to associate with. Heck! The prologue shows in itself how badly the parents wanted to keep MC away from the blood guard! Not face them, but keep them away.

"The biggest issue I have with The Crown of Exile is that it is supposed to be an "interactive fiction" and yet it feels like the choices influence nothing, save for the romance scene. No matter which option I choose for Alfh, the MC and her father note that they never shared a daughter-father bond and that it was impossible since she was her mother's daughter (yet she spent most of her childhood with him, Syl and Ishari had minimal influence over MC)."

The choices DO influence SO MUCH. MC can choose to have a more aggressive and defiant relationship with Ahlf or a more compliant and cooperative relationship. They could never have a real father-child relationship because of AHLF. He PUSHED MC way as he describe in his letter he leaves after he died! I'm not sure what the parenthesis mean but if you're saying that they spent majority of their childhood with Ahlf Cyre culture didn't affect them, it's because of how cast out MC was due to the Isharian Cyrian war and how you are able to tell through their eyes. If you're refrencing the chunk of their childhood MC spent with Salyra, MC says themself when they arrive at the Isharian temple that their mothers teachings has been long forgotten and now just a foggy memory!

"No matter how blunt and crude MC is towards Irius, they seem to be best of friends a few scenes later (there is one choice where Mc can say that she won't forgive him for calling her "just a fisherman's daughter" and it is never mentioned again nor does it really change the relationship)."

They have to work together, it is obvious that they would need to hold some semblance of a relationship. Irus won't like, romance, or defend MC if you aren't flirtatious or kind enough to him. The choices ARE impactful. That scene about the fisherman's daughter is a grudge being held against Irus. When it comes to being on the run from a blood thirsty king and his blood thirsty army, that insult is MINOR.

Honestly it feels like you skimmed through the fist two chapters and then started typing! I don't mean to sound rude or aggressive at all, I just felt inclined to defend these terrible points that are COMPLETELY inaccurate with my life because this story and author ate down.

Thank you!

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I always play as a female MC, so that's probably why I used the she/her pronouns. It is clear in the description that you can choose the gender, and the author did not correct me, so I don't think it's a huge deal. However, if the author decides otherwise I will happily correct my comments. 

It's not like the choice makes her a skilled fighter or advisor, so it changes nothing. Still, no notable skills are to be seen.

 If she became the protector/advisor later on, as she gains the prince's trust and knows what she is doing, once she develops any skills whatsoever,  then that would have been a different story.  But having a literal child with little to no, if any, fighting/diplomacy skills and any knowledge of the outside world protecting the most important person in the story, is an odd choice. Or just a choice that requires too much suspension of disbelief?  

Admittedly, I did not go as far as chapter eleven, as the story was clearly not meant for me. And I did read it some time ago. 

It made it perfectly clear, yes. But it doesn't matter. It's not like Ahlf couldn't have taught her some self-defence, once the other kids attacked her. Couldn't have built up her endurance, strength, strength or agility (which would have been useful, considering what type of life they led). Or just teach MC about the world surrounding her, about this strange and unwelcoming country, its history or people. If not himself, then I'm sure there was at least one kind grandmother in the village. It just gives you some skills, some idea of what you are up against. The lack of any of this, suggests to me that Ahlf was unconcerned with keeping her safe, keeping her alive.  Especially considering his past (you mean to tell me that he wasn't aware of the possibility of his past catching up to them?) and the position that he had. You can keep someone away from something and yet give them some chance to succeed if your efforts are unsuccessful. This argument was however explained by the author (still idk how I feel abou it, but awkward daddy Ahlf seems like a real possibility).

The choices with Ahlf influence MC's behaviour, yes. But not the outcome. And you are supposed to shape the story through your choices. Now, I will acknowledge that most IF stories have some elements that are unchangeable and if this doesn't happen constantly or affects minor characters (Ahlf dies really early on, so let's call him a minor character) it's a-ok. Still, even a different letter for a defiant MC (the version we've got, if Syl is as defiant and violent maybe) and a cooperative, affectionate MC (telling her he loved her, that he wished for the relationship with her, but that was for the best) and an MC that is constantly scared would have been nice, that is all. 

It could be minor. Or it could be a huge deal. Some people would forget about this instantly. Some would hold a grudge forever. Some would keep wondering if that is how the prince sees them even a month, a year, a decade later. And we are talking about a kid who was belittled, neglected and/or ignored her whole life.

 The kicker is - they don't have to work together. Or at least not as equals. This particular relationship could take various forms, much like aby other in the game. But, at least at the time I stopped reading, nothing truly changes between the characters. Sure, we've got some different dialogue options, but it's not like they made a real difference. Maybe it changes later on, idk, I did not read the entire thing, which I think I've mentioned somewhere earlier? 

I wouldn't say that the points are terrible. I would say, however, that I expect different things from fiction than you do. I would say that I pay attention to different details than you do. And that we simply think and analyze differently. And I would say that I stopped reading.

Then again I may be wrong, you may be right and my whole line of reasoning is shit. Who knows? Defo not me, prolly not you, so I will leave it to the people bored enough to read this thread to decide.

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Since you stopped reading early on and there's only seven chapters it makes sense!

Again, notable skills ae throughout it, but a big one comes in chapter seven, I assume you didn't read that far.

Ahlf spends most of his time fishing to provide for him and the MC so he wouldn't have the time to teach them anything. There were NO kind grandma's or kind people in that prejudice village. The only knowledge MC got was from books that Ahlf owned.

There wasn't anybody else to take care of Irus after Ahlf died. There was no later, Irus needed a companion and MC needed to carry out their fathers mission. If MC didn't accompany Irus as his protector/ advisor there would be no reason to accompany him at all because he wouldn't need them. Irus came to the village seeking Ahlf not MC, but since Ahlf died MC was all he had. It's not like either of them had proper training since Irus wasn't raised to be king. 

Ahlf may have known the past would catch up with him, but if he did he likely would have tried to run with Irus and MC. He left his lil death note thinking more so if it happened not when it happened. If Ahlf had survived the village attack and escaped with Irus and MC, he would have started teaching them self defense and battle stuff then. All of that is gained through Oren, reading and experience though.

I will agree with you that the only time we've seen the non-character stats come into play is when you ask to learn about politics with Elora and you use that knowledge with the businessman Irus was hanging out with at the ball. This is only an early version so it will probably come into play later.

I'm responding with this all out of order but, the author could only make so many reactions. You could be indifferent, angry, sad, etc.. in response to the happenings. For example, after Ahlf dies, MC is sat at a river and you get to choose how they respond to his passing. I personally chose anger, and later (if you're not mean to Irus)he'll ask you how you felt about it. The emotions you chose at the river will come flooding back to you. This is minor but a consistent point!

When you say it influences MC's behavior bot not the outcome this is true, but nothing to do with MC'S choices. Take it like this, you have a crush on somebody who isn't attracted to you. You befriend them and try really hard to become more than friends but that just won't happen because they aren't attracted to you! No matter how had MC tries or doesn't tries, there will always be a wall in theirs and Ahlf father daughter relationship because Ahlf will not allow them to grow any closer to him.

The same thing goes for this debate I guess! I really enjoyed it though, but if you have different tastes then not much can be done, lol. I don't know if anybody will read this book of a thread but if they do then they might allow us some third party insight on this!

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I'm impressed with the use/choice of music - it's not amazing in its own right, but it works well as a background without being intrusive or becoming monotonous.

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I'm glad the music wasn't intrusive! I usually turn off music in IF because it feels that way 😅

Ah Etti. She's just a spinster and is technically older than most girls 'her age which means that they're in the same age range but Etti is far older than most.

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Aaaaaaa the cute shyness, i wish many could do this good of shy romance. Also good work on the story

I do feel that some of the romance options are missing something but idk what, probably just me tho

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Hoping you keep mobile users in mind. 🙇‍♂️

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For now, the game is planned to be released on Steam when it's completed. I will likely create an apk version of the game, which will be provided here on itch.io as a trial run to see if there's any interest in one. I'll likely put it on Google Play once there's a high enough demand for it 😊

most major IF platforms support mobile for a reason. (twine, choiceofgames, ink, even workarounds for renpy games thay dont native-support mobile). it'd be a nice chunk of the market you'd be catering to~

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I am aware of that. It's a matter of cost and time on my part. I'm writing and coding the game entirely on my own and have a day job that takes up most of my time. It's a passion project for me, so getting it onto Steam alone is something that I consider a massive achievement 😊 It's why I'll only do a mobile version when it's feasible for me.

You've gotten a lot further in much less time than many others, without abandoning the project or putting it on hold, so I have no doubt that you will succeed in getting this onto Steam :) 

But can I ask, do you intend to charge for the (whole) experience once its complete, or will it continue to be PWYW?

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Thank you! It will be a paid game. While I would love to host it for free, it costs money to host it on Steam and get proper artwork so I will be charging for the game.

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i was waiting for my classes so i decided to play this and I am currently at the point of meeting the grandmother and omg i have never fallen in love with a if or characters so quickly i love the complicated realthionship mc has with their parents (more so their father i almost cried when he died ) and i cant wait to learn more about salyra. also my gay ass is just smitten with both irus and oren (i dont know who i wanna romance ahhh) i cant wait to read more!! also i definitely wanna draw art of the characters (and crown the beloved horse🩵) 

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Thanks for giving the game a chance while you were having a break! I really appreciate your support ❤️️ I'm glad you're enjoying the complicated family relationships - there's quite a lot in store once you get to Part 2 of the game! Have a playthrough for both Oren and Irus 😋 Their romances are quite different to each other, so you'll be getting a lot of different scenes. Thanks for your support!

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Amazing! I can't help wiping tears while I was reading the vivid chapters of MC's childhood and the relationship between MC and the family,the heritage of Ishari, it reminds me of my past days in a broken family. And the romance,adventures and conspiracies make my heart beating. I do enjoy the romantic contents, All ROs are really charming and witty. My favourite is Queen Elora, I can't stop fallen in her passion and affection though I know she is cunning and unattainable, she is so lovely, the taste of forbidden love is just......classic.Thanks for your work, looking foward to new chapters.

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Thank you so much for playing! I'm really glad you're enjoying the game and the emotional aspects of the family dynamics 😊 I'm so happy you're enjoying Elora's romance! I was worried that not a lot of people would be interested in her route, so I'm always happy when people gush about her. She's cunning, but definitely not unattainable. Expect a lot of smooching in Chapter 8 from her 😂

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OKAY, I CAN'T CONTAIN MY EMOTIONS, IT'S SOOOO GOOD QWQ

I once added your work to my bookmarks and at that time I read only small part of the prologue, when so many chapters were not written. Just yesterday I came back here and COULDN'T TEAR MYSELF AWAY FROM READING, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS IF!! Q___Q

There will be spoilers below, so!

I prefer to play shy characters and, MY GOOOOOD, the romance with the prince is just WOW, especially his teasing is a special kind of thing, every time it made me smile! :D And his treatment in the later scenes, uh-huh BELOVED AWW, it warms my heart so much, knowing what MC is going through, because she didn't have a normal relationship with others.

I am silent  sad  about the relationship with MC's parents...at first, I was biased against her father, but after reading it, I began to understand that he really cared about his daughter. Maybe he just didn't know how to show his love in a different way? The scene of his death (even if it wasn't a spoiler) made me CRY SO MUCH, GOD..And I began to sympathize with him more than with the mother who abandoned the child in the manner in which everything happened later. Ugh, terrible!

Meeting MC's mother at first seemed unexpected to me, BUT WHEN I FOUND OUT THAT SHE HAD A FAMILY and she was just literally hiding MC (I remember this surprise of Anu!!)

I really turned against MC's mother. And this is her obsession with MC getting to know her husband and daughter..ugh, every time my character just quarreled or snapped at his mother, haha. The younger sister is really not to blame for the actions of adults, but, ah, I can't feel sympathy for her when her own mother belittles the MC, and her husband does not understand at all what effect the mother's actions had on the MC

And I really like that mother does not approve of the relationship with Irus, damn, like do I care about her opinions?? NO lol

This work has caused me so many emotions that I cannot describe in words!! Joy and love, awe and anger, resentment and sadness, aah, and many others!! Thanks again for this piece!! I will look forward to next chapters!! <З

And I also have a question: will this IF be in Steam with a full release? I would love to buy it there!! QwQ

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Thank you so much for playing! I'm so happy you're enjoying the chapters and the characters 😊

Irus is probably my favourite RO to write with a shy MC so I'm glad you're enjoying those scenes with him!

There's a lot of angst and anger involved with the MC's parents, and if you think Salyra has explained everything to the MC, think again. She's still got some secrets that will be spilt soon 😉

The plan is to have the demo on Itch and then the full game will only be available on Steam, so yes, once the rough draft of the full game is complete, I'll start working on a Steam page for the game with a revamped demo and hopefully will have the game ready for release not too soon after that.

Thank you for the support! 💖

Haha, I have a feeling that Salyra is reeeally hiding a lot from MC. She's been hiding too much before and it's literally in her nature, I think? I will wait for the disclosure of these secrets!! Angst in relations with parents is just a kind of art here, I really luv it, ahh

And I am very glad to hear about Steam!! Thanks for the answer! <3

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Someone recommended it to me, but the description of the game isn't very... exciting? I mean, MC is a nobody and has to babysit and support some prince's ambitions? All ROs seem to have more interesting roles than MC.

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If the description doesn't excite you, you may want to try another game 😬 Unfortunately, you play the role of the MC which doesn't change.

Deleted 305 days ago
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> This is such a weird statement to make.

Not really.


> Either play the game and form your own opinion (which, to be frank, will be that this interactive fiction is incredibly well-written with likeable characters and a great setting)

Sorry but you don't get to dictate other people's opinions. Speaking of rude.


> or just don't say anything?

Nor do you get to silence people who don't agree with your opinions. Again, so rude.


> What have you contributed by saying this other than being a rude POS?

They have contributed their opinion, as is their right, as is everyone's right, whether you agree with it or not.

I don't. I think MC has quite an interesting role, while I dislike the ROs. But that doesn't mean I think they are written poorly, rather that they are written well as unlikable characters.

<SPOILER>

Notice how they all treat MC poorly when they first meet them: Irus looks down on MC because of their social status and clothes, Oren threatens MC if they don't take responsibility for a fight initiated by his lackey, Elora threatens MC for not bowing to her (much like her mother later on), and Anu is just a racist little b**** who assaults you as soon as her father's back is turned.

</SPOILER>

But the author takes all that into account by allowing MC to hold grudges and not be friendly towards them, much less romance them. Now that is good writing - and something IFs like A Tale of Crowns and Crown of Ashes and Flames could learn a lot from!

But enough of my opinions - What have you contributed by saying this?

Because make no mistake, there is only one person here being a "rude POS", and it's not OP, nor the author, nor even myself - though I will readily admit that you sorely tempt me to respond to you in kind.

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oh my this is GOOD the writing, the pace, the interactions between characters, they are *mwah* chef's kiss <3 okay this is gonna be kinda long

SPOILER-ish (ROs & MC dynamics)

plzzzzz shy MC x Prince Irus is a dangerous combo seriously like, Irus is bold and playful and loves teasing a flustered MC, and he says things like "you're always so shy, it's maddening how enjoyable it is to see you squirm like this" i was like, excuse me sir? SIR?? aaahhh- AND he calls MC beloved aaaahhhhh-

now a shy MC x Sir Oren is a (cute) disaster lmaooo i mean, one is a blushing, flustered mess and the other one is a dense clueless idiot lmaoo MC be flushed red from his attention and Sir Dense be like; "are you unwell? you look rather red, are you sick?" yes sir i'm sick, sick of your goofy ass lmaooo

BIG SPOILER

good GOD i'm pissed at mama and her new hubby, like, they're really dismissing MC's pain and anger, the hubby keeps on saying mama suffered more, mama sacrificed a lot blablabla HOW BOUT YOU JUST SHUT THE FVCK UP like come on dude, yes we still don't know the full story behind Mama's action but MC's hurting too alright?!

also the whole Rana is a blessing thing, like broo seriously??? what is MC then? a curse??? like how could you say that your new child is a blessing in front of the child that you abandoned??? my god if only there's a choice to fist fight mama & new hubs lmaaoooooo jkjk

thank you so much for bringing us along this wonderful adventure, dear author (and thank you for blessing me with Prince Irus my beloved <3), i hope you get to have good night sleep, and to never have sore throat, and you get to have your favorite food whenever you crave it! <3

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Thank you so much for your lovely comment and I'm so pleased that you're enjoying the game 😊💖

I am a huge fan of shy MCs and flirty ROs, so the dynamic between a shy MC and Irus is my guilty pleasure. I'm happy that so many players are enjoying it too, especially players who don't usually play as shy characters!

Give Oren some time and I promise you that he'll be less dense in later chapters 😋 He is quite a flustered mess himself, and flirting with him can lead to him combusting on the spot 😆

There's a lot of drama surrounding Salyra and Danzor, plus there's Rana for an extra layer of angst. It's probably not going to get better, but I can't say that it will get worse. It'll just be the usual sad, frustrating and angst-inducing scenes you've experienced going forward 😅

Thank you again for your support! 🌼

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ah yes! i don't usually play shy MC, bold & flirty thirsty af full of hoe behaviour MC is more my vibe lol and so at first I was like, aw yes let's be a tease and romance sir dense and i did play that route for a bit and i thoroughly enjoyed it BUT THEN PRINCE IRUS i mean maaaannn prinCE IRUS gaaaahhhhhh he's affectionate he's caring he's so touchy-feely he's jealous he's protective HE'S MY DREAM MAN for real for shooooo

i replayed and went for sir dense route again but it felt like i'm making MC cheat on our beloved Prince ykyk not to mention that we're shown him being jealous and feeling left out like nooooo can't do that to our future husband nope nope nope

FRUSTRATING that's the word! lmao English isn't my 1st language and i felt frustrated with the whole Rana situation but couldn't remember the word lolol Rana is innocent and my MC isn't upset with her but man i am BITTERRR my MC will be a good sibling to her but mama and hubs can go trip and eat dirt for all i care lmao

thank you so much for telling me that! at least now I know what to expect and anticipate in the upcoming story <3 with that i wanna ask if it's alright; do you have an estimation on how many chapters the whole game is gonna be? thank you!

oh also DENA! my MC's first love! we love them! if it's not too much of a spoiler, will we ever see them again? thank you! <3

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Your English is perfectly fine and I wouldn't have realised it wasn't your home language 😊

There are 12 planned chapters in total and an epilogue (conclusion). Dena is currently being written so expect to see them in Chapter 8 😉

These are questions that have been answered on my Tumblr, so if you've not already checked it out, you can by clicking here. I've posted a ton of spoilers already so you can find a lot more information on the characters, plot and overall game there 😊

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aw thank you! <3

aah can't wait to reunite with Dena! (and maybe make Irus jealous in the process lmao sorry my beloved)

ah yes i actually found your tumblr earlier just after i sent my comment and am literally binge reading everything this very moment :D

thank you so much for responding <3 i hope the writing process goes smoothly and that your favorite drink is always in the right temperature whenever you're having it! <3

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oh wow this was really good! i'll def be following closely for updates. the amount of times i've cried going through this is unparalleled!!! god i love angst.

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Thank you so much! I'm glad you're enjoying it 😊

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Tysm for this rad game R-man.  I really feel the vibes this gives off.  Overalll,  10 outa 10 no cap.  Also if you do release this on October,  that wiuld be mt bday month so yay =D.

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I'm pushing for an update by October 😅 But time is hardly on my side these days. Thanks for playing!

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hi Ramona G.

im normally not the person to write a comment to praise a game (i always have the feeling that i only repeat what others already said) but for your game i have to say some words.

your writingstyle is really immersive. i myself could really feel the emotions of the characters.

my favourite scene (besides the big plot twist after the rescue of the ishari prisoners...) was the good bye between MC and queen elora (after i decided to romance her). i really was heartbroken. you can imagine my surprise and joy when she arrives wth her boat.


now some questions and suggestions i have.

?- basic question, i know, but how many chapters are you planning to have?

?- 1) example queen elora: you often have 2 romance options; a shy response and a more direct response. will the relationship develop different depending how often you chose the shy/more direct responses? or are these more for flavour? 2) does one romance response "progress" the relationship faster?

?- MC unlock divinity: how many percent of the ishari religion do i need? currently i had balanced religion stats (each religion at 60%) and got rjected/injured. for the future: will there be a way to still unlock it even when A) you get rejected or B) if you have balanced stats?

!- while the stats wont be that important, maybe they can influence the story by using different adjectives or adding 1/2 unique sentences. e.g. "with your last breath you overwhelm the enemy" (low might) VS "you defeat the enemy and kill them with a clean strike" (high might). in this case the stats arent that important (you still reach the same outcome) but a high percentage in the right stat is still rewarding.

!- maybe you can include a static (=> no change like clothing or jewels,.....) character art of the MC in similiar style of the ones on this page. either always visible beside the story or "hidden" in the bio.


- because of personal reasons i am not able to use patreon. i still looked at it and saw some mention about side stories. are you planning to release them in the future? maybe as DLCs or supporter packs on steam?



anyways thank you for this wonderful game. Continue your good work!

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Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a comment! I'm so grateful to have your support 😊💖

I'm glad you're enjoying the different scenes and I'm super happy to know that players are enjoying Elora's romance as much as they are a certain prince's route 😅

To answer your questions:

  • There will be 12 chapters and an epilogue. The public demo will contain the prologue and the first 8 chapters and the rest of the chapters will be available to my Patrons.
  • Both shy and flirty options are there for player's preferences - you don't get bonus scenes and the romance progresses at the same pace regardless of how you choose to flirt /romance the ROs. Likewise, you are not constricted to be only flirty or only shy - feel free to choose the options that feel natural to you in each scene.
  • You need 65% belief in the Ancient Ones, Solus or both to unlock your divinity.
  • There is currently some flavour text to this effect - you probably won't see it in a single playthrough though since it's hardwired to relate to certain stats. I really suck at stats in general so I'm planning on editing and revising scenes once the first draft is complete so the stats will feature more flavour texts.
  • Yes, the side stories will be available as a DLC - I'll separate them based on ROs, general stories and NSFW stories and then do a bundle containing all stories at a fixed price so you'll be able to choose what stories you want.

Thank you again for your support!

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Oh my god this was spectacular. I cannot wait until the next chapter comes out if at all, but I literally can't come up with words to explain how much I love this. All the options for the characters, all of the characters in general, the world building, the MC, all of it is written so beautifully. I never cry during games, literally never, but I was sobbing sooo many times during this. Thank you so very much for making this game, it was astounding.

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Thank you so much for taking the time to play the game and leave a comment 💖 I really appreciate your support! I'm so happy that you felt so much emotion when playing the game 😊 Rest assured that Chapter 8 is still being written and will be posted by October if all goes to plan.

can't wait for the update that we get to lock in with queen elora.

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You can already lock in your romance in Chapter 7 which is available to play 😊

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